The pornstar/smartphone comparison
0June 23rd, 2010 | 10:55 pm
Who would have thought pornstars would work so well in a smartphone operating system comparison?
Windows Mobile
This girl retired years ago but came back for another run since her little sister was still underage. She’s the Jack of all trades who doesn’t care much about the looks she obviously lacks, but provides her services to anyone desperate enough to give her a go. Mind however that you will have to instruct her in every part of the scene, experience does not come with age.
Android
Android looks beautiful at first sight but after a while you realize that her thong and her bra don’t match. She does anything you ask but not everyone appreciate a good blowjob from a mouth that looks beat up. She does know how to swing a whip and will pour stearin all over herself if you ask her to. Unprotected sex is only recommended if you’re a doctor.
iOS
This girl looks stunning, has a killer body and knows how to tell the right words at the right time. She won’t do anal or anything that involves a whip, but she will give sweet sweet love. You will however be forced to wear the underwear she demands, no matter how bloody uncomfortable they are.
Symbian
This butt-ugly girl suffers from a bad case of narcolepsy, making every act painfully slow and frustrating. There are a few who like the suffering of this long-lasting experience and they are rewarded with a vast assortment of poorly designed accessories.
Blackberry
The naughty housewife, the executives given choice. Looks rather old and dull, but gets to the point rather fast. She is always up for some bedtime action but provides few extra numbers, and there certainly won’t be a whip in this movie!
